The Bad...

The following are some things that I have found to be "bad" over the past week in regards to this latest disappointment, but some have actually surprised me & turned into "good" things as week went on...

*It was the most "thankful" week of the year, during a time when I really DID NOT want to look forward to feeling thankful for anything...thankfully, I was able to find some things to be thankful for :)

*Four family functions to attend wearing my "everything is wonderful" face. Fortunately, by the time I had to attend most of these functions, I had already had several days to deal with everything on my own so this really wasn't all that "bad" in the long run either. But if you would have asked me if I was looking forward to them last weekend, that would have been a whole different story.

*The questions that are always left unanswered/unasked after this type of thing happens.

*The questions/comments that sometimes get asked/made that seem totally inappropriate.

*The baby's situation in general.

*Surprising, the people who know what happened & don't offer so much as an "I'm sorry to hear this" and also the people who do.

*Watching Luke being so ready to be a big brother & being unable to give him that opportunity. I hate hearing him refer to our extra bedroom as "the baby's room" when sometimes it feels like we may never get the chance to give that to him.

*The holiday season in general, honestly, I was not really expecting to get to take part much in it, but with this turn of events I have actually thrown myself into it full fledged mentally & I am feeling a bit excited about them in many ways. (So I guess this could actually be a "good" thing now :)

*Going back to work tomorrow~in many ways I'm ready & in many ways it sends me into a sheer panic...I have a feeling it may end up being a very long day, possibly with several questions that I'm not really ready or willing to answer in regards to the situation...

I promise only one more post on this topic & then I'm putting it away-maybe not forever, but for quite awhile anyway!